75 days of being my favorite self
'Tis the season for everyone and their mothers doing the 75 hard challenge! I deleted Tik Tok, but I can see it now, scroll after scroll, are those daily 75 hard vlogs. Listen, I am not a hater! I honestly love watching those type of vlogs. It is fun to see people work to better their daily habits and just hope that watching them could give me even an ounce of that same motivation and dedication. With the start of a new year, it is to be expected that everyone wants to take their stab at the infamous internet health trend and I don't blame them.
If you read last week's blog post, you will know I talked about new year's resolutions and my goals for this upcoming calendar year. This is a follow up blog post! This is kind of like my action plan. How am I actually going to implement those goals into my life and make them maintainable for this year? My tailored 75 day "challenge" of spending the next 75 days intentionally living as my favorite self.
I have always said I wanted to try the 75 hard challenge. I liked the ideas of just going HARD for a set period of time. I do know myself pretty well though, and I am actually so incapable of doing the exact same thing for 75 days straight. I know there is variability in the rules, not everyday needs to be the same workout or book, but the rules are still pretty strict. Rightfully so, it is a challenge!
I know Alix Earle is doing a 30 hard challenge, and Lexi Hidalgo is doing a 15 day reset. So, there is also inspiration online without that dauntingly high number of 75. I actually remember seeing a Tik Tok awhile ago from Lexi talking about doing 75 days of trying her best, which I loved this concept. So shout out Lexi Hidalgo because she inspired this series! I want to just try to do MY best everyday as well, no matter if that looks different for me than other people on the internet. If I can try my best and be my favorite self for 75 days, then who is to say that I will ever stop after that time period is up!
A few of years ago, I began to see my current therapist. She is such a gem and I am so thankful that I have had her to bounce my thoughts around with over these last few years. I cannot remember the exact conversation we were having the day she told me this next piece of advice, but it really stuck with me. I remember immediately sharing it to my Tik Tok and several people in the comments really resonating with this idea.
"Jordan, just be your favorite self. Don't work everyday to be your best self, but do things that make you feel like your favorite version of Jordan."
To me, trying to be my best self has lead to burnout. I think it has to do with the idea that being your best self, in our society, will always be tied into capitalism and your productivity. My best self was overexerting myself, and performing really well on paper. The funny thing about this mindset shift, is that being your favorite self is normally the "best" self anyways. The best version of yourself is the one who is doing things that you love and that are good for your mind, body and soul. It is doing the hard things that make life feel easier, while also gives yourself compassion when you are not perfect. The words you choose are really important though, so I love this version of the challenge.
Being my favorite self differs day to day. It involves listening to my needs and how those can vary. It is called 75 hard for a reason, it's not going to be easy, but I just want to put energy into creating a life and routine that is maintainable past a challenge. I just don't feel like 75 hard is meant to help you transition into implementing all those habits regularly. I could be wrong, I have never done it and again, I think it is great when people are doing it. I just find myself to be a very extreme thinker and I want to work on that this year. I am so all or nothing. If I mess up AT ALL during 75 hard, I would just quit and want to restart my 75 days. Maybe people don't actually care if those habits can be maintained, they just want to challenge themselves for that period of time, which is cool too, I just am at a point where I want a baseline level of health that I can maintain. I want to set a standard for my life, and I think this will be a good start for me.
This 75 day "challenge" leaves room for the flexibility I want while maintaining a degree of structure, that I need. It can be tailored specifically to you too, it just involves a little bit of self reflection. This isn't anything groundbreaking, I won't lie to you. This challenge is basically just a 75 soft version, but I am huge on self talk and shifting your mindset can be so powerful. I think by wording it "75 days of being my fav self" motivates me to improve the quality of my life more than 75 hard, but that is just me! To each their own, truly!
Now, friends, I present to you my "rules" for 75 days of being my favorite self!
1. MORNING MENU'S ARE IN!
If you have never heard of the morning menu, you probably are not chronically online! I am kidding.... sort of! It is this concept that I first heard about on Tik Tok. I am not sure who the original creator of this was, so I apologize for not being able to give credit where it is due. It is the idea of writing down a list of activities that are beneficial for either your mind, body or soul. Not every morning is meant to be spent doing everything on your menu, you get to pick and choose based on how you are feeling on the day.
This is perfect for someone like me with ADHD. I struggle to maintain routine and I have already been implementing this in my daily life to help combat the monotony of my routines. It allows me to feel like I have a choice. The goal is to have a list of things you enjoy and that help you be your favorite self everyday.
If you watch my vlog about this on my Youtube, you will see that I wrote a list of things that I can do in the morning to set myself up for a great day.
an activity for your body
I am someone that typically works out regularly to begin with, so I am not super stressed about implementing this rule. My goal is to get in 1-2 outside walks a day and a gym workout. Some days, I am exhausted. I cannot just force myself through a heavy lift session, I might still go to the gym, but do some light cardio instead. Some days, I take a morning and evening walk outside. Some days, I hit the gym for a heavy lift. I am not strict about it being 45 minutes, like it is in 75 hard. I care about going to the gym and just keeping that habit. Sometimes I just can't focus for 45 minutes and I don't want to force it. I would rather go for 30 mins than decide not to go at all, since I know I won't stay for 45. I also find that high intensity workouts don't always need to be 45 minutes. I can get just as an effective one in 30 minutes as well. My goal is honestly to just hit my daily goal based on what my Oura ring is telling me. That technology is helping me listen to my body and it's recovery periods.
Moving my body and being active is the best way that I can take care of myself. I love being active, I enjoy working out so this is not the hardest habit for me to implement. Ever since traveling, I have been active a lot less and I really missed weight lifting regularly. My favorite version of myself works out because it makes me feel good in my body and it improves my mental wellbeing and focus throughout the day.
For 75 days, I do want to hit my step goals for the day and just remain active through the winter. My hopes, by allowing for active rest days and variability in my workouts, I will not burn myself out and be able to maintain this routine far past the 75 days.
an activity for your mind
My typical choice for this one is to journal right when I wake up. I am a big fan of the morning pages taught in The Artists Way, which by the way, is such an incredible book. I will admit, I have struggled writing 3 pages recently and I am not sure why. Journaling that much every day can really bring everything to the forefront and that is not always easy. I have been getting back into that habit and that is my top priority in this category. I find that journaling allows me to get all my thoughts out before I start my day.
On the opposite side of that, another option is to spend the morning reading and putting someone else's words into my brain. I like this option to help keep me off my phone and electronics. It can still be stimulating and engaging, but helps keep my screen time to a minimum, which is something I am focusing on this year.
Another example of something to do for my brain is practicing my Spanish! This is something that I am really wanting to improve over the course of this year. I make sure to keep my Duolingo streak alive and my goal is to practice for 15 minutes everyday.
an activity for your soul
My spiritual journey is something that is very important to me and I need to do something every day that just reminds me of how valuable this human experience is. My activity options that are good for my soul can really include anything. I mean technically, the activities for my body and mind are also connected with activities meant for the soul. Under this category though, I am mainly focusing on doing a traditional meditation practice everyday and sitting in silence with myself.
I got a teaching certificate in meditation awhile ago, and I know that everything can be a way to meditate, but I also really like setting aside time to do what we would consider a more traditional practice; sitting with your eyes closed, legs crossed type of vibe. This is not the easiest thing for me as someone with ADHD, but it is really good for me regardless.
When I am not feeling this method, I like to just boil some water and make myself a tea. I have found that drinking tea is really meditative to me. My morning starts well if I can sit and drink my tea in silence and just think to myself. This is an activity meant to better my soul because it allows for that presence that I need. It is really important to be able to fully hear yourself outside of the noise from our society.
Like I said, so many things can fall under this category. To me, as long as I am intentionally setting aside some time to engage with the more spiritual side of life, then I am paying attention to my soul. As a spiritual being, everything you do is spiritual, even the most mundane human things. I don't need to be sitting down to meditate with my crystals to hit this goal. The options are endless. Do what feels right for you.
2. SPEND TIME IN THE KITCHEN
In 75 hard, there is a rule about choosing a diet and sticking to it. I have seen this one modified to cater to people who struggle with disordered eating and I think that is so great. I struggle with eating enough food. I have this thing called AFRID, avoidant food restrictive intake disorder. It is not the same as anorexia, you could google it, if you are interested in learning more.
Basically, I am a certified picky eater. I am kidding and coping with humor, because it is awful to have. It is not by choice and it is one of those things that makes my life quite difficult.
Because of this though, I am someone who needs to put more energy into creating meals for myself. Choosing what to eat, preparing the food, AND eating the meal takes so much energy for me. It is genuinely the hardest thing about living for me. You're telling me I have to cook and eat 3 meals a day for the rest of my life? Ugh! It is so much work...
I am someone that likes to eat pretty much the same thing everyday. I don't crave a ton of variability, but that can be tough when I randomly hate my safe foods one day. It is very frustrating. I recently have discovered that cooking helps me stay in the present moment. It is something I can control about the day. I really have been finding it fun to put on some music and cut veggies! It is so simple, but it is something I was not doing before this. I have always hated cooking, but I am really trying to enjoy the process more this year. Surprisingly, that is going well for me.
If I want to get really crazy, maybe I will try some new recipes. For now, I am just proud that I am cooking anything besides instant ramen and quesadillas. I am gluten free now, but that is besides the point!
I am vlogging a majority of this journey for my Youtube and the cooking section is the one part I am hesitant to show. Everyone is so unique when it comes to food and I am no health expert. I will be showing some things I am eating and making, but not everything! I don't want the focus to be on the food I am consuming, just the fact that more effort is being put into it.
And since I am a consistently inconsistent person, I am giving myself grace when I do not have the executive function to make a meal because that unfortunately is my reality as someone who is disabled.
3. NON NEGOTIABLE NIGHT ROUTINE
I am giving myself a few options in the morning to choose how I want to spend my energy for that day. While I am making sure to hit every important category in the morning, I still have flexibility in what I am doing. It can vary. My night routine just cannot be like that. This year, I really want to work on improving the quality of my sleep and that involves consistency at night. I recently got an Oura ring, and I have loved the insights it has given me about my sleep. This ring also helps me determine what kind of day I am going to have. If I have a high readiness score, I am going to hit the gym extra hard, but if it is lower, I am going to reflect and see if I need to have a rest day. Even on rest days, I do try and get out for at lest one walk, if not two, one in the morning and one in the evening.
My night routine needs to be stricter because it helps me prepare for a good night's sleep. Now that I have been more aware of how I spend my energy at night, I know what works best for me to get the best night of sleep that I can. For 75 days, I want to focus on maintaining my perfect evening routine.
My night routine starts when I head to the bathroom for a little skincare session. I recently have been loving putting more effort into my skincare as it grounds me in the present and it feels great to be physically taking care of your body. My ideal night routine includes me doing a full skin care routine, followed by oral hygiene. Admittedly, I have not always taken the best care of my teeth. Now, I am kind of a teeth hygiene freak and I love taking care of my teeth, so that is an important part of preparing to sleep!
After this time spent to myself, I will go and make a tea. Tea is the key to a perfect, cute, little night time routine! It is even better if is a sleepy time melatonin tea, those knock me out! I get all cozy drinking my tea in bed. To really hammer the nail into my sleep coffin, I will then read a book. If I can get to 10 pages, cool! Most likely, I will be so exhausted from the tea that the words on the pages will put me right to sleep.
This is how I can ensure I am prepping myself for a good night of sleep. It isn't too crazy of a routine and that is exactly what I need because it makes me actually capable of maintaining it. I also am aiming to get to bed within an hour of the same time every night. According to my Oura, my ideal bedtime is between 9:45-10:45, so that is what I aim for!
4. CREATE!
A huge part of being my favorite self is setting aside time for me to be creative everyday. My goal is to aside 30 minutes of writing a day. Ideally, this is time to write for this blog. On days I am feeling mentally blank, I will accept other forms of creativity in replace of this. I enjoy knitting, coloring, editing photos/videos. I would love to add other activities as well.
Creative acts are the most important aspects of my life currently. They meet the requirements of being something beneficial for my soul and my mind. It allows me to be in touch with my inner child more often, and that is so crucial in living a fulfilling life, in my opinion. I would love to talk about this more in a separate blog post! Pleasing the younger versions of myself is honestly one of my biggest priorities in life.
Having a creative routine will allow for creativity to flow more naturally. It is really easy to have that part of you blocked when you are not creating art regularly. One reason why I love the morning pages is that they are really beneficial when you are blocked because it makes writing a normal process again. It removes the pressure of needing every piece of writing you are producing to be the best you have ever written. It helps with perfectionism, and we all know I need all the help I can get with that one.
The vibe of this year is putting effort into passion projects. It is okay to do something for the fun of it, the creative high, and the spiritual fulfillment. This year, I am working on allowing myself to be vulnerable and share what I am creating. It would be so off brand if my 75 days did not include any intention to deepen my creative practice.
5. BE INTENTIONAL
My main goal of this year is to just be more intentional with being in the present moment. Unfortunately, this just does not come naturally to me. If I am not aware of it, my mind wanders and I could disassociate through an entire week without really doing anything. It is concerning how that can just happen to me. I actively need to be doing things that ground me in the present.
Everything I have talked about before this point falls under this underlying theme. Having a morning and night routine, cooking meals, creating art, and moving my body are all things that make me feel really present and just grateful for the day to day.
I just want proof, that is what I want out of these next 75 days; proof that my daily habits do genuinely affect my quality of life. Because they really do!! I am sick and tired of sleeping through life and wishing I was somewhere else. I currently live at home, and travel every few months, which is a great system for me, except I struggle with maintaining daily habits that are really crucial for me. When I get back home from a trip, I want to hibernate until my next one. Not this time! I am using this time to develop a comfortable, present life at home so I am able to use these habits while traveling.
It is nothing crazy guys! No hard rules, it is not even much of a challenge really. I mean, I will definitely struggle with some of these. I am still a mentally ill gal! It works for me though. I tailored the original to fit my needs and goals a bit more and I am really content with how things are going so far. I am currently housesitting and by being in a new space, it has been surprisingly easier to implement these new habits. Some days I can accomplish more than others, but every day I make sure to hit those non negotiables and it has made for a really present start to the year, which was my goal.
If you are doing 75 hard, good luck! And if you are thinking about just implementing new habits that allow your favorite self to manifest, let me know! We can be on this journey together. As always, I hope reading this has allowed for some self reflection and inspiration for you.
Thanks for reading this week, friends. Keep an eye out for my weekly vlogs on Youtube about this journey and remember to live a life that charges your soul. Talk to you next week:)
with love,
Jordan